6 Miles!!!

I did it. It nearly killed me, but I did it. Six miles in one session. I ran 30 minutes (at 5.5mph) of the 78 that it took. I really wanted to see if I could do it. My feet are sore, and I am pretty sure I will be sore tomorrow. I still need to stretch and do my situps and pushups because the little guy was begging to nurse by the time I got done.

So I just had to brag a little. I am quite proud of myself!

A New Scale

I finally broke down and bought a new scale. We needed a new one so bad. I purchased on that measured BMI and hydration levels.

I am a little dissappointed in it thusfar. It seems a little unpredicable. I was also shocked to see that when I weight three pounds less, My BMI was supposedly up a percent.

I don't understant it. I think a trend down is what I am looking for so I don't care how I get there.

My meeting tonight

Well, the news was better than last week. I didn't gain. I lost 1.2.

The thing that irritated me was the fact the leader was like "Oh, see you are losing again!" WHAT? So I lost one pound! Don't get me wrong, I am happy it wasn't a gain, I am just not ready to hang the "yippee, I am off my plateau" banner. I will think that when I am past the four pounds that I have lost 20 times in the last 7 months.

The answer I keep gettting is, well, keep at it. Of course, I am going to keep at it. I have no other choice. I do think that my WW leader should have more ideas than eat less, eat more, eat less, eat more, keep at it.

UUUUUUUUUURRRRRRGGGGGGGGH!!!!

Feeling Proud of Myself

I logged 20 miles this week! TWENTY. My goal this week was 18, and I thought I might have overdone it. I am still not running them all, but I am moving and that is all that matters.

It makes me excited at the thought of what I might accomplish this week. I am setting my goal this week for another 20. I know that if I keep moving and pushing myself this weight will come off. I am confident.

5 miles!!!!

I did it. I logged 5 miles in one session on that dreadmill! I ran in intervals, and walked the rest. I worked out for a total of 66 minutes. I am quite pleased with myself. I am exhausted, but happy.

I really feel that I am accomplishing something even though the scale isn't moving. I feel stronger. I feel like my lungs are stronger, almost bigger. I feel my posture improving. It is weird, and I am sure undiscernable to anyone else. It is all about how it FEELS.

I can't say that I don't hope to see that scale moving REAL soon. I neeed it to move. I want it too. I will it to, yet it doesn't. However, I am happy with the subtle changes going on, and I know that I am healthier because of it.

My meeting last night.

It doesn't get anymore frutsrating that this. I have only been weighing in every three or four weeks. The last time I had weighed in, I had finally lost three pounds. It put me down where I was before, but at least the scale was moving in the right direction.

Since then, I have been working hard. Staying within my points. Getting in exercise. I walked/run 16 miles last week.

I weighed in last night. I am back up the three pounds. I almost cried.

Babysteps

The weather was wonderful here today, and I just couldn't help but spend the day outside! I got up and hit the treamill this morning. I started running, but I just couldn't handle the running, so I decided to just walk. I walked for four miles in one hour. It felt great even though I was tired. Later, Julie and I took the kids for a very short walk down the street and back. This evening, Julie and I took the dogs for a walk. I know we walked for at least 30 minutes ( I am guessing) and we got in another near two miles. Six miles today. I am sure that I will be feeling it tomorrow.

The funny thing is the exercise makes me feel like I am DOING something for my weight loss journey instead of sitting around and waiting for the weight to just fall of or something. I have been so stuck for SO long. I know that there have been times that I could have done better, but I keep thinking when I am being good shouldn't I lose SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!!!!

It has been a full year since I decided that I was going to change my life. My life is different. I have lost nearly 60 pounds, and I feel like a new person. More than my clothing size is different though.

I have realized something about myself. I have always seen my weight as THE issue. The key to everything. Every time that I envision myself thin, I have money. I have an organized house. I know what to say at the right times. I never feel like I want to crawl under a rock. I have perfectly behaved kids. I have GREAT HAIR! I have everything. You see for a fat girl, I have always seen my fat status as my biggest issue. It was the one thing that was holding me back, but as I have slowly learned about myself is that I haven't learned to deal with some thing sthe way that I should have. The other things that bother me are not there because of my weight!

I still feel like hiding under a rock so very often. I still feel ike an idiot in a group of people. I still second guess even those closest to me. I still am intimidated by thin people. I still have trouble with my kids. I still have trouble getting organized. I am still not rich! All those things that I like the least about myself are still there no matter what the scale says.

I am having to learn to deal with so many of these issues. I am just trying to babystep through them. I have been working on the house and disorganization issues. I have slowly tried to ease my routines again. I have been trying to find the Flylady bandwagon again. I have been trying to to get that kind of stuff under control.

I know that there are issues that are much bigger than the way I feel about my house. I only feel like I can tackle a little at a time. So here is where I am starting. We will see what happens.